Basically, I was born and raised LDS, and I would never allow myself to consider the fact that maybe the things I was taught to believe were wrong. Over the course of my membership, I constantly encountered doctrine within the church that I would disagree with. I would label it "Mysteries of God", set it to the side, and continue on living with a split soul. About 3 months ago, I was standing in my bathroom, and suddenly, as though a bubble had popped in my head, I was confronted with the fact that the church conflicted with the very basics of morality that I held as sacred inside of me, and, because of this, could absolutely not be true for me. Within the period of three seconds I went from full believer to a person who was shocked that I had ever found a place in my mind that allowed me to believe. It was done and cannot be undone. I look at the person that I existed as for the past 30 years, and I see a stranger. Everything is changed, everything is bright, everything is clear, and my soul is whole. I know that this hurts many of my friends and family, and I absolutely understand, because I would have felt the same way even 4 months ago. It's ok to feel sad about this and confused about it. Just know that my love has never been pretend, and has always been authentic. I love you.
I came across your blog because of Facebook and I just have to say, I love you. Thanks for having the courage to live true to you! I left the LDS church 4 years ago and it was a very long, soul wrenching process. I am grateful your transitions seem to have been much quicker.
ReplyDeleteI wish the very best and happiness! Beautiful things are in store for you as you now live in harmony within yourself and with your soul truth!
*HUGS*
JoAnna Ashley :)